It is hardly a secret that RATM are on the Record label Sony, and as such, their record sales lead to profit for Simon Cowell. Joe McElderry sold 451,000 copies in the first week whereas RATM sold 503,000. If we compare this to the last male winner of X Factor, Leon Jackson (not a dissimilar artist to McElderry) who sold just 275,000 in the first week, then that is an increase of roughly 679,000 records for Cowell’s company. So it was very much in Cowell’s interest for this ‘competition’ to drive sales by over 150%. He also doesn’t see the Christmas number one slot as vitally important as evident by the fact he delayed the 2004 X Factor single to let that horrific Band Aid rehash get to number one. So the result of this ‘victory’ over Cowell has been both a hindrance and an advantage for him.

Even people who don’t like X Factor generally consider Joe a nice bloke. His life has changed and his dreams have come true. Only the deeply cynical would begrudge that to anybody who seems deserving. It may not last that long, and having the Christmas number one would cap an amazing few months for him and his family, to remember forever. Still, wouldn’t it be funny if we got a song with swearing in it to Number One even though we won’t care come Boxing Day and he’ll have to wonder why the country seems to have ganged up on him?

To sum up my feelings in a clumsy analogy - people have essentially paid Simon Cowell for the chance to kick over Joe McElderry’s sandcastle, mistaking it for Cowell’s, while Cowell sits in his real castle that was part funded by the fees paid to kick over little Joe’s sandcastle. High fives all round.

If we want to annoy Cowell next year I suggest we ring his doorbell and run away having left a big pile of cash on the doorstep.