In the aftermath of yesterday’s St. Patrick’s Day festivities, numerous experts in Irish culture have been questioning the ancestry of some of the people out celebrating, dressing in green and pretending to like Guinness for the evening.
Reports from nightclubs and themed pubs across the country last night suggest that many were celebrating on the basis of being ‘at least 1/64th Irish’, and that this arbitrary percentage made this their national holiday. Some venues have even stated that up to 45% of fights last night were not started by Irishmen.
Professor of Irish Studies Greg Hannity said:
“It’s a very disturbing trend. When I tried to explain who St. Patrick was, I got beaten up by a group of topless green men and told he was the patron saint of f***ing shit up. Sometimes, I think that these people don’t value the holiday at all and actually just want to get drunk and party. It’s a worrying thought, but it could be true.”
Similar reports of rugby fans supporting Wales in the recent Six Nations match because ‘they’d been there once on holiday’ are being investigated.