Man Can’t Wait to Not Watch Film Friend Recommended Him

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Jordan Long, a sales assistant, has reported that he’s excited to not watch a film that his friend recommended to him and is instead intent on watching old movies and complaining that there’s nothing good to watch anymore.

Coming home from work on 8th June, Jordan decided what he really needed to wind down for the evening was to switch on Netflix and watch fictional people living better lives than himself in peace.

Eager to find something new, he scrolled right past the recommended section and browsed thrillers starring Liam Neeson as some badass with a gun and buddy cop movies starring Dwayne Johnson as some funny badass with a gun.

He scrolled and scrolled past scores of films and TV shows ready to be streamed to his home instantly. He could try The Walking Dead, but changed his mind after he saw how many seasons there are, wondering how a show could go on that long without dropping in quality (spoilers, it doesn’t).

Perhaps he would watch The Revenent tonight, but he doesn’t really feel like being pretentious. Or Serenity, but the cancellation of Firefly still hurts him too much. Concluding there is literally nothing for him, he settled on Shrek 2, a film that never failed to bring joy to Jordan.

Keith Rodgers knew his friend Jordan’s struggles and understands – he’s currently on his 4th rewatch of Game of Thrones, but it’s just not the same now he knows how poorly it ends. He knew Jordan’s tastes though – tightly written narratives and characters, well-choreographed action, and above all, Tom Hardy.

With this in mind, Mad Max: Fury Road seemed to be the best choice for Jordan to try out, which Keith recommended to him whilst they were at work together the next day. Jordan listened intently to what Keith had to say, smiling and nodding to the strengths of the film and Keith’s verdict of it.

Above all, Jordan couldn’t wait to not watch it, adding it to his collection of films he wouldn’t be watching this year, or as he put it, presumably quoting some movie, ‘I’ll put it on the list’.

 

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