Residents Ignoring Dam Evacuation say it ‘Can’t be Worse than No-Deal Brexit’


The Whaley Bridge dam evacuation has entered its sixth day following the damage caused last Thursday to the Toddbrook Reservoir walls. However, in a surprising turn of events, some residents were permitted to return briefly to their homes to collect some essential belongings and refused to leave, ignoring multiple warnings by police.

Whilst waiting for certainty that a sufficient amount of water has been pumped out so that the dam will hold, the police have hit a ‘brick wall’, as they have seemingly exhausted their powers of persuasion on the self-willed residents. They have urged the 22 residents to consider not only the risk they pose to themselves, but also to the emergency service personnel who have to keep entering the evacuation site to talk to them.

The police have told residents remaining in the Derbyshire town that if the dam fails, absolute devastation will be caused in seconds. However, the tricky ‘remainers’ say in response, ‘it can’t be worse than a no-deal Brexit, which is growing more likely by the day’, completely disregarding the authorities’ message of ‘do or die’.

One resident, Harold Watson, told a Wessex Scene reporter:

What with our new Prime Minister dead set for the country to leave the EU, I don’t see the big deal faffing around with all this evacuation malarkey. It’s not like I can just evacuate the country when we leave on WTO terms now, is it! The way I see it, this is just practice for all the chaos that’s heading our way come Halloween.

Mr Watson added that the authorities ‘better get used to people telling them ‘no’ if they know what’s good for ’em’. When asked if he was being a ‘stubborn re-moaner’ he replied ‘Can you blame me? All these people telling me to prepare for the worst and be happy about it! Gah’.

The target level of water, which is being pumped out of Toddbrook Reservoir by emergency crews, has now been reached.


Former News & Investigations Editor 2019-20. I'm a serial Netflix-binger, writer and big time radio nerd. I like politics and comedy (the two seem to be more blurred nowadays) as well as Sci-Fi and 'geek culture'. Video essays are my current obsession. Studying Natural Sciences at Uni of Southampton.

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