Boom, Boom, Shake Thou Room – A Poem in Ode to Something

0


Hey, my name is Guy and this is my deal

I was arrested and killed and that is real

All I wanted was to fix what had been done

A wrong committed that was never undone

See what had happened was the King came to town

Made all of my buddies and me proper frown

So we had a plan that involved a boom boom

Where we would really shake up thou room

We wanted him dead! That mean little King

The sounds of their screams in our ears would ring

But it wasn’t to be, I got found out and caught

So all of our troubles had boiled down to nought

People burned effigies of me in a way

Which was quite insulting since we scuffed up our fray

To sit atop a bonfire, what does it mean?

A fake man burning bright, completely obscene

But my house on the bonfire has been laughed at and mocked

Actual terrible people have been chucked up and rocked

I’ve been compared to Hitler! If you believe

To think we are the same, it is very naive

What I did was for the good of people like me

Not enforcing a widespread and irreparable monstrosity

Yet every year I get burned at the stake

Much like a witch trial where oust I would spake:

“Please, I’m just like you! Loving the bang, crack, kaboom

With fun colours and fire lighting up the room

Except I prefer mine blasting a building up high

Whereas you like aesthetic explosions in the sky

I never killed no-one, so why am I here?

‘Tis I that is celebrated each day each year?

Is it true? Do you love me? Am I an icon to you?

For doing what a proper Christian boy would do?

I love you my people! Wait, our time is running short!

You’re throwing on small bits of paper as a last resort

We’ll meet again next year, I can promise you that

As long as you made me of straw with my Capotain hat.”

Just then like that, the ash blows away in the wind

And I am left wandering, like a sardine half-tinned

Waiting for you all to come back and remember

Blowing up Parliament will cause a dismember.

Not just for treason and plot should I be forgot?

No, think also of my beats, sick and hot.

avatar

A philosophy student with a penchant for uncertain puns. Pause Editor 20/21, i.e. funny sausage

Leave A Reply