Indoor Sports Tournament Renamed ‘Four Weddings And A Funeral’
Applications are open for those hoping to hold their events at the tournament, with a promise of quick divorce and official club merch.
→Author: Emily Dennis
Emily Dennis
A philosophy student with a penchant for uncertain puns. Pause Editor 20/21, i.e. funny sausage
My Relationship With… Baking
Emily Dennis shares her fond memories of baking in the lead up to the new series of the Great British Bake Off.
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What to Expect from Welcome Week 2020
Welcome Week will be running from Monday 28th September to Sunday 11th October and will→
‘Humans Can’t Get Viruses Because They Are A Virus,’ Says Research
Research has shown the only ways humans can get sick is from bacterial infections and 360 skateboard flips.
→![Credit: EU2017EE Estonian Presidency [CC BY 2.0 (https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)].](https://www.wessexscene.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2019/06/Boris-Johnson-looking-worried-359x201.jpg "PM’s Reasoning for Social Limit Announced As “IDK Funny”")
PM’s Reasoning for Social Limit Announced As “IDK Funny”
Johnson admits his policies will focus on ‘massive LOLS’ from now on.
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The Quarantine Guide to… Decorating Your Room Like You Don’t Already Hate It
Let your creative flair loose with some helpful tips and tricks to upgrade your space into one that looks like you’ve personally outlived the apocalypse.
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Government’s New COVID-19 Test To Use Predicted Grades
There are currently no U-turn plans in place for the new and effective system.
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Review: Kala Thai, Bournemouth
Sam Pegg and Emily Dennis review their taste of Thailand at Kala Thai, Bournemouth.
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Rich White Man with Private Doctor Rules Coronavirus as ‘Not Too Bad’
Coronavirus got you down? Try running a country and stealing public funds to make yourself feel better.
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‘Paracetamol is the Devil in Disguise,’ Says Activist Group
‘Today marks the end of unexpectedly opening a very chalky packet of pills.’
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